I laughed, I cried... and I enjoyed every minute of it-Story of a back piece, The Conclusion

I had to wait a while to write this last part. Part of it was because of my schedule. Part of it because I was in shock. Yep, in shock. It was such an intricate process. So many sessions over a certain amount of time. And when it was first discussed, I was warned that it was a process that would require a lot of time and money. That I understood, especially since I knew how far Adam was booking out. Only a mere five months at the time. I also thought that since I was the girl who powered through a six-hour upper arm piece, this would go SO fast. Yeah, not so much...

From the seal cover-up to the Golden Gate Bridge to the trolley car to the mountains and the trees to the Giant Dipper to the carousel horse and, finally, to the poppies. And let's not forget the fog that ties it all together because what would Northern California be without fog? :) My "quick" little back piece ended up being 10 sessions (if memory serves) and around 24 hours (give or take) of table/chair time, with those individual sessions ranging anywhere from an hour (which shocked both of us because short sessions were never our thing) to four hours. That's one whole DAY of either sitting or laying down and letting someone voluntarily poke at me with multiple needles. Glutton for punishment or did I give someone a canvas for which to put his art? Guess that depends on how you look at it...

But through this drawn-out process, I actually managed to learn things about myself, my body, my artist, the whole tattooing process and so much more:

• First off, I have one of the higher pain tolerances of anyone I know and, being a massage therapist who does a lot of structural/therapeutic work, I also know my body extremely well. So I thought my back was going to be one of the least painful places to get tattooed. Until I remembered that the tissue around ribs can be a little sensitive. And sometimes the spine. And the bra line. And over scar tissue. Oh, and did I mention that my muscles SUCK because I massage for a living? So I will be the first one to admit that the pain (while still totally tolerable) was more than I anticipated in certain areas. And mainly on my left. Definitely the more sensitive side. And while he could have tattooed my traps all day and I wouldn't have felt a thing, my ribs and those dreaded love handles were a totally different story...
• Magnesium is a godsend when it comes to having to relax your muscles. I took it from about session #7 on or so and I felt the needles less and it relaxed me at the same time. And it didn't affect the healing process at all. In fact, it might have actually helped it. And another thing about hanging out in a tattoo studio for 24 hours or so? It was kind of a refresher course for me (who learned a lot about skin and the healing process in massage school), being around people who know just as much if not more about it. 
• I used my muscle knowledge and every meditation technique I could think of to zone out so that it was a pleasant process for both myself and Adam. Can't say I did the best job at times, but for the most part, I was half-asleep (while still totally conscious of what was happening around me) for most of those 10 sessions. I mean, come on, I have to ground myself for a living. Doing it for a tattoo session is not much different really. And yes, Adam, that's why I didn't talk much. :) Also I realized (and now I'm totally giving away all my secrets) that if I relaxed the muscle he was working on as much as I could (sometimes it was nearly impossible due to how I was sitting or laying), it hurts less and it's easier to breathe through. Also, if you exhale as the needle is going in while you are getting rib work, you're not resisting the needle as much, making it a much more "pleasant" process. Leave it to me to relate massage to tattooing. Hey, both of them involve a lot of the same things, just instead of a needle, I use a very pointy elbow. ;)
• The client and artist have to collaborate together in order for this to work out the way it needs to. He has to be happy with what he is putting on me and I have to be happy with what he's putting on me. Obviously, it's my back and I have to live with it. But he has to be happy with it because it's HIS artwork I'm putting it on my body and he wants to show it off and he wants me to show it off as well. So it's like one happy tattoo "marriage" and I was his tattoo "wife" for a few months... ;) 
• People watching at a tattoo studio is entertaining as hell. As well as hearing all the stories and truly getting to know the personalities of everyone at the shop. They were always friendly, but they got friendlier when you brought them cookies. Even the artists you've never come in with all of a sudden know who you are. ;) And while you conversed with and observed everyone in the shop, obviously the artist working on you was kind of the main focus. So what did I notice about Adam? Don't worry, hon, I'll be nice...
• He's a slight perfectionist, which is an awesome thing in my book, Because when you think about it, do you really want someone NOT detail-oriented or a perfectionist putting something permanently on your body? I wouldn't. And if he is always looking for somehow to make it better, then he's becoming better in the process. Although, that did make for some "focused" sessions and I did want to tell him to breathe a few times... ;) 
• In the year that he was consistently working on me, I saw him grow leaps and bounds as an artist. He was always an exceptional artist (and that's in my totally unbiased, non-artist opinion), but throughout the whole process (hell, even dating back to the angel), he just got better. Not just on me, but on other tattoos as well. And there is something I absolutely love about seeing someone who loves what he does for a living just keep growing within that profession, all the while still loving what he does. 
• As exceptional of an artist as he is, he's just as exceptional as a business owner. Oh yeah, he kind of owns Fallen Owl too. ;) That's always been a big thing in my book because I spent way too many years in management and customer service and I've seen the good and the bad when it comes to owners/managers. And he's one of the better ones out there. And no, I'm not just kissing his ass. ;) While you are in very close proximity to this man for 24 hours or so, you notice how he manages and deals with customers and employees alike. Hell, he talks about the shop and tattooing so much, I found it very easy to slip back into my old PR habits and promote the shop easily because he gave me the ammo to work with. And all this time I just thought he was spewing a lot of hot air, which was also true. :)
• He will be the first person to yell at me for NOT mentioning the rest of his shop in this blog. Because they are a family. A very happy and severely disfunctional one, but a family nonetheless. :) And you can tell that they make each other better just by being in the same shop. When a business is truly firing on all cylinders (and the shop has truly grown in every way since I started coming to Fallen Owl), everything is just...better. Adam, Freddie, Sherley, Chris, and now Angell are all in another league when it comes to artists. And Miss Kasja holds down the front desk and everything else in the shop. The vibe has always been awesome in the shop (I laughed constantly during most of my sessions) and that helps their clients be more relaxed the minute they walk in the door. 

I love everything that I learned in this whole process, but I think the most eye-opening thing happened during my last session. I pretty much knew that we would finish it that day. I had no other appointments on his schedule and did I mention that he's now booking out until next year??!! As in 2015. And this was at the end of May. So I knew that we would probably push to get it done that day. While there were some painful spots and I had to really concentrate on breathing a few times, I all of a sudden found myself crying on the table. But not from the pain because I honestly didn't feel it right then. It was an emotional release. There was a lot of built-up emotion from the whole process. The stress of not knowing what we were going to do until the day of at times, the elation after seeing each section of it get finished... The emotions you feel for the artwork, the artist, the shop, as well as the emotion behind the meaning of the artwork itself. I mean, a major piece of my childhood is now permanently on my back. Like until I die. That's HUGE. And as someone who feels everything with her whole heart, that hit me hard. Especially when I realized that it was over. Like I could sleep on my back again over. And I could shower with my back to the water again over. For about a week after my last session, I went through a mourning of sorts. Shock, denial, sadness, giddiness. While I was happy that we were finally done, I had put SO much of my energy into it that I had severe withdrawals when it WAS done. Wait, I don't have to think about it anymore? I don't have to wait a week for everything to heal? I don't have to say, yeah, we're almost done, anymore? Weird... And I may be the only person in the Universe who feels this way, but I kind of doubt that I am. Because it was a true life process. And life processes can sometimes tear you down to the raw core of everything, just to open your eyes and make you learn something from it.

And I learned something huge about myself. I am a hell of a lot stronger than I think I am. Physically, mentally, emotionally, I am one tough cookie. No, not one of the ones I brought them. ;) I knew this in the back of my brain, but I guess I needed a very large reminder in the form of a very colorful mural on my back. And since it's a tribute to the state I will always love, I also have a reminder of where I came from and who I really am. I'm a Californian, damnit. Regardless of how many years I spend in Colorado, I will ALWAYS be a California girl. It's who I am. The girl who tears up when she sees the ocean or the Golden Gate Bridge. Or who still giggles when she sees the Giant Dipper's rolling curves or when she gets the ring in the clown's mouth on the carousel at the Boardwalk. Who proudly states that she's from the Golden State, even when the Coloradoans are bitching that the Californians and Texans have taken over the state. And I love that me getting this back piece has brought me back to that. So this may have been a painful process. It may have been an emotional process. But I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. I went in for a back piece and somehow got my life back at the same time. I will never be able to repay Adam for that, but I know that I will be forever grateful...

Thank you for reading this truly lengthy conclusion to something that has consumed my life for the better part of a year.  I really hope you take something out of it. And if nothing else, I hope you go to Fallen Owl for your next tattoo. ;)

Facebook post- "So two and a half years ago, I walked into his tattoo shop, saw his work in passing and thought, "maybe he'll do something on me at some point..." A year later, he gave me my most complimented piece (my angel). And now, yet another year later, he gave me the back piece only he could give me. A big, bold, colorful tribute to the craziness that is Northern California. And proof that a San Jose girl and a Santa Cruz boy can get along.  Thank you from the bottom of my heart, Adam! Better than I ever could have imagined and can't imagine anyone else doing it. I absolutely adore you and your shop and you proved that stumbling into your shop two years ago was the right stumble.  Oh, and might I add, go see everyone at Fallen Owl Tattoo, Denverites!"

Artwork by Adam Rose of Fallen Owl Tattoo